Soon
by AlresMaark
Summary: A late night phone call gives Santana some hope. One-shot. Santana POV. First fic. Go easy on me guys. R&R much appreciated. Rated T for Santana's cursing.


Santana would never get used to how cold her bed felt without Brittany. Sure, she'd been the one who insisted on Brittany going to dance school on the opposite side of the country. Stupid freaking scholarships. Why couldn't a New York school have given Britt a scholarship that good? Damn, but she didn't realize at the time just how much she needed her Britt-Britt. Okay, that was lie. She knew exactly what this was going to cost both of them. To say she missed Brittany wasn't enough, not even close. They used to be together everyday and then suddenly, they just weren't. Every morning over the summer she woke up to Brittany. At night she would, eventually, go to sleep with her too. Now she was used to that and Santana couldn't sleep without her. It had been months since school started but still. She missed her warmth lying pressed up against her. She missed the way she smelled. She missed how Brittany's hair would tickle her nose and neck when they snuggled together. She missed the way her arms fit just so around Brittany's waist when they would sleep. She especially missed those nights when her girlfriend would roll over half asleep and switch their positions. She loved that, being pulled in close by Brittany. Having her warm breath on her neck and back. She would unconsciously put her hand over Santana's breast and it just seemed to _fit_. Like that's where it was supposed to be. Like how every other part of them fit together.  
Santana sighed and rolled over, throwing her right arm out to feel the cold side of her bed. She had to be just the biggest idiot in the world, sending her girl away. She knew that Brittany loved her, but there were all these _what if's_ constantly floating around Santana's head. She was never sure how she managed to keep Brittany. Here she was, Santana. Lovingly referred to as 'Satan'. Her room was literally painted black for Christ's sakes. She had been possibly the most feared person in school because she was just out and out mean. And good at it, there was no denying it. But somehow, she got Brittany. She'll never figure out how but she was _HER _Brittany. Brittany who was light and good and sunshine and bunnies and frickin' kittens all the time. Okay, not all the time. Sometimes Britts got sad. And just thinking about that suddenly made Santana's blood boil. She knew that right now her girl was probably just fine, snoring the night away, but the possibility that someone had hurt her and Santana hadn't been there... The thought hit Santana and a whole new wave of grief and anger at her stupid self imposed circumstances almost knocked the breath out of her.  
She sat up in bed and looked at her clock. 3:12. Craaaaap. She had a 7:30 class. And tomorrow was the last day before finals. So she had to go. Damn. Oh well, she'd just chugg half a gallon of coffee and get over it. Tomorrow was Friday anyway. She could sleep the afternoon away or just all of Saturday. Oh yeah, sure. She'd sleep then like she was sleeping now. Maybe if she didn't sleep at all tonight she'd just finally collapse and sleep the weekend away. Who needed a weekend? She probably needed to study for finals but whatever. And it's not like Santana really liked going out on the weekends anyway. There were all these couples and people dancing and it all always just reminded her of Brittany. Jesus H. Christ. She was depressing. She reached for her phone on her bed side table. As she picked it up it buzzed in her hand. The surprise almost made her drop it. It was a text from Brittany.  
_Can't sleep. Thinking of u. Love u. _  
Santana smiled and immediately replied.  
_Me too. I miss you. _  
Her finger was hovering over the call button when her phone began ringing in her hand.

"Hey B." She smiled into the greeting. "I miss you"

She said it without even giving Brittany the chance to say hello back.

"Hi San. I miss you too."

Santana could hear the smile in Brittany's voice. Brittany loved it when she was all sappy. And Santana loved to make Brittany smile so she'd finally come to terms with the whole 'talking about feelings' thing. How she felt about Britt made her happy. And telling Britt made her smile. She was just glad that the blonde felt the same way. Otherwise, well, Santana didn't like to think about that. It was doom and gloom. And she was talking to Britt, so fuck the doom and gloom for now.

"I can't sleep without you."

The Latina hung her head. What? It was true, but she still didn't have to like admitting it.

"Me neither. But maybe you won't have to next year."

Santana's head shot up.

"What do you mean?"

She knew should not be this hopeful over a few little words. But the sudden increase of the beating in her chest told her otherwise. She didn't realize how hollow she actually felt without Brittany until right now.

"Weeeeell. I got an internship for next year already. I guess a lot of freshmen don't get them for some reason. I dunno. It's in New York. For a place that does all this musical theatre stuff. I get to dance and help choreograph. Apparently, I'm really good."

Santana was surprised her face hadn't broken she was smiling so much.

"Brittany, please, please, PLEASE don't be kidding."

Santana begged. She thought if Brittany were playing some sort of joke this was awfully cruel.

"Of course not San, why would I ever joke about getting to be with you?"

Brittany asked in that adorable puzzled tone that Santana loved. She could practically see the look on her girl's face. The little scrunch of her nose and that questioning look in her eyes.

"You're right. I'm sorry. So you'll be in New York?"

Santana almost hated herself for how desperate she sounded, but she realized she didn't actually care. Brittany was coming back to her. And they could live together in this apartment. And walk down the street holding hands and...

"Yes. I will be in New York. Is that okay?"

The questioning tone of Brittany's voice confused Santana. Why wouldn't she think Santana wanted her here? She wanted her here. Now. Yesterday even. And tomorrow and every second of every day in between.

"What? Britt, yes. Yes that's fine. I want you. Now, here, yesterday. Can you get here yesterday?"

The blonde laughed.

"So, you're excited?"

Brittany teased her, whatever insecurities she might have had a moment ago now forgotten.

"Yes Britts, I'm ecstatic"

The Latina was standing by her bed now. At some point the excitement had just become too much for her to be in bed anymore. She even noticed she was bouncing on the balls of her feet.

"Oh San, be careful. I don't want you to hurt yourself. Stay away from metal stuff."

Santana stopped bouncing. Suddenly very confused by this turn in conversation.

"What?"

She asked again completely confused, the second time in less than a minute.

"What, what? San, you said you were static. That makes sparks when you touch metal stuff so be careful. I don't want you to get shocked."

Santana smiled at the obvious tone of concern in her girlfriend's voice. She laughed to herself. God, she missed Brittany. She had the overwhelming desire to drive to Los Angeles to kiss her girl right now.

"No babe, I meant I'm super excited. I can't wait for next year now. Too bad it's only the first semester of this year."

Santana frowned. She realized it was only two weeks until Christmas break when they'd see each other again. But that would just make it worse. Getting to see each other again and then being apart, again. Especially since she knew that they could actually be together now. The waiting might literally drive her insane.

"What do you mean? It's almost next year already San."

Her girlfriend said it in a dismissive tone. Santana was half expecting a 'Duh' to be attached to the end of that sentence. And then everything clicked into place. Next year.

"Britt-Britt, when you said 'next year' you didn't mean next school year you meant...?"

Santana trailed off, hoping so hard that Brittany was going to say that she meant January. That her girl just meant literally the next year.

"January. Not the school year. Soon San. Really, really soon. We get to be together again really, really soon."

The Latina could hear all the emotion in Brittany's voice. All the same needs and desires. How much this distance between them was hurting her reflected there in Brittany's words. She realized again, that somehow Brittany needed her just as much as she needed Brittany. Santana shook her head. She didn't know how Brittany did it but she always fixed everything. She always made everything so right.

"God, I love you."

Santana finally said, smiling to herself. She had her eyes closed tight, picturing that look her girl had on her face every time she said that to her.

"I love you too San. So much. I miss you."

The Latina heard her yawn through the phone.

"Sleepy babe?" She asked.

"No!" The blonde said, suddenly very emphatic.

Santana smiled again. She'd probably smiled more during this phone conversation than she had in the last week. Her face was starting to hurt.

"Babe, it's okay. You can sleep now. In fact, I'm kinda feelin' sleepy too."

And Santana was. It was like there was this lightness in her heart now. Well, again really. This was how she felt around her girl all the time. Well, almost as good. Better than she'd felt in a while anyway.

"I don't wanna go to bed yet. I wanna keep talking to you." The blonde replied in her best pouty voice.

Now the Latina was actively not trying to picture Brittany's lips in that perfect pout she did. Because then she really would have to go to LA tonight. There would be no way around it. She sighed.

"How about I sing to you? Just a little. So you can sleep."

The blonde loved it when Santana used to sing her to sleep when she got sick or when she was sad because some asshat had called her stupid. Santana just loved it when she got to hold Britt and stroke her hair. And it would be under the guise of friendship, because that's what friends do, right? Not that she cared at all about that anymore.

"Hmmm okay."

Brittany pretended to concede but Santana knew she loved it. She heard a click and then the sounds of sheets rustling.

"You're on speaker so I can cuddle up under the blankets. Sing to me."

"What do you wanna hear?"

"Uhhhh. How about a christmas song?"

Santana smiled. She knew exactly what song she should sing...

'_I'll be home for Christmas_  
_You can count on me. . ._

Santana finished her song. She heard her girl sigh on the other end of the line.

"Good night. I love you."

She heard some fidgeting and then Brittany say

"G'night S. Love you too." before they both hung up.

Now Santana was wide awake again and suddenly she felt cold. Like the all the warmth from that conversation was immediately extinguished once she couldn't feel Brittany on the other end of that line any more. Santana sighed and then plopped back down onto her bed, arms and legs splayed out. A smile crept over her face. Soon enough she wouldn't have to be alone in this bed. Soon, if she did this, her head would probably be resting on her girlfriend's stomach. Soon. Very, very soon.


End file.
